"RSVPing" is important A No-show will cost you!

A No-show will cost you!

Dear readers, it is time for me to lay it out. I am far from perfect! When I accept an invitation and then I don’t show up? I feel bad, really bad.

I might have lost a friend because of my lack of discipline and consistency. A couple of months ago we received an invitation from dear friends for a get-together, nothing fancy: just neighbour getting together for a good night of conversations and sharing. The invitation called for an rsvp, which of course we did promptly. 

Etiquette requires answering an rsvp within 3-day to a week, from reception date. Enough time for the hosts to take care of all the details surrounding a reception by knowing how many people will show up. Except that, on the day of the party, I, and my significant other, decided to take a long walk under a wintery rain. Wind blowing in our faces and the elements were deliberately tackling us, so much that when we came back home at the end of the afternoon, we literally crashed…slept only to wake up when we were expected to arrive at the party. Then we spiralled downward…we did not call, we did not excused ourselves, we became invisible, avoiding our own demeanour…So much so, I am now living in shame ( a tad exaggerated but close to  truth).

An article written not long ago by Susie Boyt and published in the Financial Times explained that frustrated hosts decided to take action: if you rsvp and don’t show up, you will be fined! The rationale is simple, hosts are spending hard earned money to create a lively ambiance with food and drink for you to enjoy. This is especially true when it comes to kids birthday parties where not only there is hired entertainment but loot bags to make your little angel think it is the Holiday Season all over again. If 15 kids are expected and only 8 show up, it leaves a sour taste; therefore, the idea of sending a bill. You commit or you pay! It might seem a bit drastic but it might take just that for people to learn what “rsvp”ing means: simple – Yes or No!

RSVP has been around for a long time. It stands for “Répondez s’il-vous-plaît” which means “Please respond”. The imperative form in the French should have given us a clue: No Show is not an option! It is an importance piece of protocol which goal is to enable the allocation of resources.

Today, we sadly see more and more people showing no comprehension of politeness strategies. Responding to an invitation in due-fashion is important. Showing up and being agreeable is the logical and the subsequent well-mannered comportment. Sadly, we take friendships for granted and, as we feel entitled to be wined and dined in great style, we forget the effects of our action, or should I say, of our inactions.

In the case of my improper behaviour, I have not received a fine for my no-show. The dire consequence of my egoistical moment is that I’ve might have lost a friend. This in itself is pathetic. It lowers my quest for a civilized humanity to accepting an era where bad manners are becoming the norm. If I could apologize to my friends, I would beg to give me another chance. I promise, I will never ever again be one of those “no-show”!